We all know what time of year it is. There’s no mistaking it by any means of avoidance or distraction. It’s that time when we start thinking about how next year is going to be better than the last and how we are going to ensure that happens. Right? You know it, it’s resolution time. The time of year when dillusions of grandeur creep into our minds. I think I have finally figured out how this happens. We get ourselves all hyped up on sugary treats and delicious food that has somehow warped our minds into believing anything we want it too. Like how we are going to look like Tyra Banks’ top model by the end of the year; or how we are going to have that three to six month safety net nest egg in our savings account at all times.
I figure why should one fight the dillusions? They might as well take seed and see if they grow at all. So, I have a few things for the list of resolutions:
1. I refuse to be the fat friend in 2010. Two of my friends are going to get gastric bypass surgery and these two are some very determined individuals whom I have all faith that they will be successful in their endeavor. So where does that leave me? Either I’m going to be the fat friend or I’m going to do something about it. I can’t do the gastric bypass and I certainly don’t begrudge those who do. So, I will be changing my lifestyle in 2010. Yep, I am not going to be the fat friend if it kills me; and even if I’m dead — I’m not going to be the dead fat friend either.
2. Total debt inihilation. This year, since I won’t be spending a lot on food, I’m going to be heading into the total debt inihilation game. It’s the hardest game to play but it pays off way more than any other game I’ve ever played. Ok, I don’t play a lot of games, but this one is a challenge like no other. I don’t have a lot of debt, but I don’t have a lot of income either. So, it’s a challenge to go bare bones through the middle of the year. No frivilous spending of any kind. Easter is going to suck this year but oh well. Easter isn’t Christmas anyway so it shouldn’t be that big of deal. I’ll blog about this (if I remember) around Easter time.
3. Purging of the excess. This year I will be doing more purging of the excess around the house. You know those clothes that hang in the closet forever because I have some sort of emotional attachment or dillusion that somehow they will come back into style or I might fit my fat butt into them again. I suppose with not being the fat friend it could happen, but I think I’ll stick to the purging and reward myself with some new stuff that is definitely in style. I’ll be cleaning out the boxes of stuff in the storage closet — stuffed animals by the hundreds; I swear they’ve been breeding in there. Anything that is broken or used up. I recently saw a preview of that show hoarders and I don’t want to be any part of that. I might have to enlist the help of my neurotic cleaning daughter to assist on this one. She doesn’t keep anything that doesn’t have an immediate use.
4. Kicking the Marlboro Man to the curb. I think he has overstayed his welcome in my household — about 20 years too long. This one isn’t going to be as tough as people think it will be. I am one of those annoying smokers who only smokes when I am bored or others are smoking. You have to be a smoker to understand how some smokers can be annoying. If you’re not a smoker and you don’t understand you should be glad of it. People often say to me, if you only smoke five to seven cigarettes a day why do you smoke at all? Good question. Seems like a total waste of time and money; not to mention a person’s health.
So there they are: My dillusions of grandeur to haunt me all through 2010. I hope when the sugar overdose wears off my dillusions will remain with me; at least for the most part. I might not be America’s next Top Model. I might not be completely debt free. I may still have a few collections of emotional attachment. But, I will not be smoking. That’s a must without exception or excuse. In 2010, I might not be the friendliest of sorts in the first quarter but I’ll get over it. I’m assuming I’ll be going through the five stages of grief and loss during that time. These are some substantial things to lose; like my friends. So, don’t be surprised if there are some grouchy posts or whiney posts. It’s just me saying goodbye to some old friends forever.
Do you have dillusions of grandeur sneaking into your mind for 2010?